The Linda Finkle Hall of Fame

Back around '05 to '06, for my birthday my wife gifted me my very first iPod and back then podcasts was the next new thing. I checked out many podcasts like Nobody Likes Onions, Keith and the Girl and Red Bar Radio. There was one podcast that I found which was different from all of those; that podcast, which is hosted by Tim Henson called the Distorted View Daily. The best way to describe Tim's podcast is as the audio version of fetish pornography. His show is best known for featuring the most disgusting, most disturbing audio the Internet affords us.

One really has to have a strong stomach to even attempt to listen to his show but if you can manage handle stuff like the dick hole guy and "chicken nugget!" you'll be rewarded with amazing features like his Linda Finkle Hall of Fame. The Linda Finkle Hall of fame is a bit Tim has come up with to feature the worst music his listeners could conjure up.

For the past few years, before I started this website, I quit listening to DV; I become less interested in podcasts and DV became too much for me to handle. I've recently started following his show again and was reminded of Linda Finkle.

I will pepper in Linda Finkle nominees throughout the week, but for now, let's concentrate on its namesake.

I don't really know much about Linda Finkle and I don't care enough to do too much research. Besides, her music really speaks for itself. Her website hasn't been updated in a very long time. for example, the song she's most proud of, Georgie Porgie, an anti-Iraq war song is still considered "new". She has an album, which you can no longer purchase from her website. Don't really know where she went. I suppose the attention she got from Distorted View inspired her to focus her "talents" elsewhere.

Now, let's get started.

Beautiful Day

This song is the perfect place to start. It really highlights her extremely bland style. Oh, what an inspiring chorus, right? The whole song really says nothing. It's like she walked around with a note pad taking notes on what she's seeing. It's very much like that friend who tweets about every little thing she's doing. "I'm going upstairs!" "I just woke up!" "Time to start my day!" "I'm taking a walk." "Oh crap, I skinned my knee. Ouch!" "K, I'm back home" "Time for bed, night all!"

The Day the World Went Away

I find this song especially humorous. Her next song, she really hated Bush but in this song she's proclaiming her faith in him. "Do what you have to do." But when he did what he felt he needed to do -yes I know the Iraq War had nothing to do with 9/11- he's all of the sudden evil. It's very obvious she was writing this and the following song because they were the popular feelings of the day. Not to say she didn't believe what she was singing; it simply illustrates her two-dimensional style. These songs were really bad 10 years ago, but now, looking back, they're now somehow even cheesier.

Georgie Porgie

I was in college when the Iraq war started. There were two types of people who were against the Iraq war: those with valid points and those who were against it because Bush bashing was considered popular. Obviously Linda jumped on that latter, "War for Oil" bandwagon quickly. I mean, back then I didn't really care if a person was against the war just as long as they knew why. I've always had no respect for people who base their opinions on bumper sticker slogans. Suffice it to say, spending freshmen year in a liberal university at the start the of the Iraq war was mind-numbingly annoying. In terms of politics, generally speaking, college-aged kids are complete idiots - very parrot like - and professors are always willing to "enlighten" them.

But of course, in retrospect, that's not to say the Iraq war was a good thing.