Thank You Facebook

People, will you ever learn? There's been at least three examples this year alone (1 2 3) that writing a song about facebook is a BAD idea. It'll only result in you looking like a complete tool. What's even worse is this one's a collab. I don't want to see a middle-aged hipster dancing to a bad song. Why would I want to see a group of middle-aged hipsters and their spoiled kids dancing to a bad song with a cheesy British rap break sprinkled in?

Brush Today - Jessica Williams

I'm at a loss for words. I'm guessing the mix master is the chubby kid with Bieber hair. At their age, they should have at least a concept of melody and beat. Even white kids. At least now we know the general demographic who call themselves Rebecca Black fans.

The Baddest - Froggy Fresh

Every time characters like Krispy Kream Froggy Fresh and Money Mike show up on the Internet in a little video like this that goes viral they always turn around claiming it's a joke obviously no one is getting. I never buy it. They're always too quick to defend it. I blame basements: it seems like every time you mix teenage kids, a computer, a few props and a basement a horrible ego trip put to shitty hip-hop ensues.

I Love My City - Lower Valley Tres

It's always good to have community pride regardless of it's problems. Just as long as you're not the ones causing those aforementioned problems. I'm sure these guys are cool; bad hip-hop isn't technically illegal.

Oh Boy - Shardinay

Surely we've all been stuck in a situation where we were forced to hear drama between a woman and her boyfriend. This woman went so far as to make a song out of her spat. I'm starting to believe there's actually people who enjoy airing their dirty laundry out in public just so we are forced to hear; as a form of attention, like they think we want to hear. I bet you if my theory is correct, most of these women have a name like "Shardinay" or some other pseudo-cultural egocentric name ripe for parody.

Happy (Sequel To Friday) - Patrice Wilison

So sad. Rather than making fun of yourself and trying to make an equally bad music video, maybe actually try to find ways to evolve your musical ability. Right now your musical ability is nil. You're a joke and obviously you know that. Your not a comedian because you're not funny just as you're not a musician because you don't produce music. There is no dignity in being known by how much you suck. At best that'll get you a reality TV show; obese teenage and middle-aged women really seem to enjoy a steady diet of multisensory shit.

I'm rarely down on our culture of consumerism -it's a natural activity for any civilized society- but don't you think it's in our best interest to consume a little more healthy stuff? Just because you can doesn't mean you have to force-feed yourself five cheeseburgers every day. Have some Jazz!

Welcome To The Zoo (UMASS Amherst) - Paul Markham

It's finals week; a.k.a. that time of the year I'm glad to have graduated from university. I remember a lot from school and there is a lot that I've forgot. Whatever the case may be, I'm pretty sure this doesn't reflect my own college experience. Sure, there were girls and lot's of fun; I just don't remember being so douchie and annoying.

The Satan Of Hell - The Black Satans

According to their facebook page, The Black Satans "is true Norwegian black metal from Finland" who "sold their souls to Timo Tolkki in order to get this piece of shit done." To me, they appear to be a less unique, less talented black metal version of Green Jellÿ. Whatever the case may be, they're sure fun to watch.