Nickelback performing at the Detroit Lions 2011 Thanksgiving Day Halftime Show

I was deep in a turkey coma when this was on but apparently it happened. How Nickelback playing the halftime show in the Motor City could ever sound like a good idea to anyone is beyond me. Then again, Nickelback playing anywhere, anytime is paramount to a war crime; it's something that should never happen. I never say this to anyone but Nickelback, go back to Canada!

Merry Auto-Tuned Christmas

You know it's fall when Christmas ads start taking over the airways. Bad holiday commercials is as seasonal as changing leaves. This was one of the first commercials I've seen this year. Let's all agree not to shop at stores that use auto-tune. Let capitalism do our talking. But then again, I don't think anyone shops at K-Mart anyway.

Santa Claus is Coming to Town - Justin Beiber

I guess Beiber is going to pepper out another piece of crap every couple of weeks between now and Christmas. And yes, I guess I'm going to pick up every steamy, corn-filled turd that flies near my head.

What is this with this video, anyway? I guess he seen Christmas specials as a kid - well, a slightly younger kid - and always wanted to know what it'd be like to be in one. Either that, or he's hacking those Christmas stop motion things Mad TV use to do (under the same vain), which he would still consider retro. Whatever the case, even in clay form, he still looks like a short-haired, lipstick lesbian.

I'm Cute - Melissa Molinaro Old Navy Ad

Kim Kardashian is suing Old Navy over their new ad, claiming the actress/singer is her doppelgänger thus, in proxy, Old Navy used her image and likeness without permission. I don't know, maybe the girl looks a little like her but any inflated ego could claim any attractive, thin, young brunette is her double. But okay, let's say this specific girl is a dead ringer for Kim; personally I feel that's a moot point. It's not her. Old Navy didn't make any claim that it is her and they didn't make any mention of her or any of the Kardashians whatsoever in the ad. And even further, if Kim wins the case you can guarantee that'll be the end of this poor girl's acting career; no one would hire her in fear that the Kardashian lawyers will soon be knocking on their doors. Surely any rational court would throw out this case. I'm assuming this case is going to be handled in California so, so much for any kind of rational.

The Ring Didn't Mean A Thing - Kim Zolciak

I never watched a single second of any of the "Housewives" reality shows or the Bravo network so when these old hens release asinine crap like this it doesn't hit my radar very quickly. I really may need to dig a little deeper. This little idiot alone made three singles: "Tardy for the Party", "Google Me" and this abortion. It really is so amazing how much of a carbon copy each song these jackasses release are. What's even more amazing is how oblivious they appear to be.