Friday - Rebecca Black

I can only hope and pray this is intended as a joke. If this is truly where music is going I weep for our culture. This little girl makes Rihanna's use of auto-tune seem almost natural. The ho-hum, monotone lyrical style, the redundancy, the unbelievably generic content matter. And who was that doing the now stereotypical rap break? That looks like Malcolm-Jamal Warner. I was wondering what he's been up too.

If iTunes had a thrift shop, Rebecca picked up this song after Bieber dropped it off. What makes things even worse is this song wasn't written by a 13-year-old girl, no matter how much it sounds like it. I know you won't believe me but this song was written by an actual adult who writes music for a living; according to Wikipedia, some hack named Clarence Jey.

I don't blame Rebecca for the debacle. She's only doing what every 13-year-old girl would love to do. She and all her friends do indeed look like every single teenage girl from the past 10 years. I blame the adults who hope to make an ass load of money. I also blame the brain dead morons who eat this kind of garbage up with a spoon. If you brainless twits didn't spend all your money on, no matter how horrible it happens to be, the next new thing, we may still actually have some dignity left in our musical culture.

Really, you morons buying this rubbish are the ones who should take full blame. It's unfair to hate on a little girl or to blame capitalism. As some screaming nut job once said, "America's chickens are coming home to roost!"